How to Crash a wedding in five simple steps
by Holmes1216
Summary: Tenth catches Eleventh with River and get's annoyed. Really annoyed. So he decides to crash the wedding. Bad move. There's a Scottish ginger who won't let that happen. Will he live to tell the tale? DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything!
1. Chapter 1

**Holmes here. New story. Enjoy...**

Donna and the TARDIS were,once again having an argument. The Doctor watched on, amused as his ship hummed an annoyed retort.

''Bunk Beds are not cool!'' she cried dramatically. The Tardis flipped some switches and buzzed, almost to say

''There! Happy now?'' Donna grinned.

''On second thought, I rather liked the Bunk beds'' she grinned cheekily as the TARDIS let out an exasperated sigh. She winked at the Doctor who was rolling around on the floor, clutching his sides

''What's up Space Dunce?'' she asked as she strolled off. He picked himself up, still giggling like an idiot and yelled to Donna

''WE'RE GONNA GO TO ARMIK5 OK?'' she stuck her head out and nodded

''OK Spaceman.'' he rolled his eyes

''Technically it's _Deep_spaceman''

''_Technically_ I don't care'' she said, patting him on the shoulder. He rolled his eyes and flipped a switch. The TARDIS lurched, he frowned

''I can't control her. She can't control her! We're going to crash!'' The TARDIS flipped and wildly shook and shuddered. Suddenly it stopped. He staggered over to the doors and pulled them open

''Oh. Well that's different.'' he muttered. Donna poked her head out and saw _Professor Song, _who incidentally was supposed to be trapped in CAL hugging some random bloke with floppy brown hair and a bow tie, of all things. She noticed him

''Pretty boy!'' she said, hugging him. The other guy raised his eyebrow

''You know, he's really not meant to be here.'' he muttered to her. She nodded and glanced over her shoulder.

''Neither are we.'' she reprimanded. He rolled his eyes and muttered something to her. She grinned cheekily and kissed him. The Doctor felt his jaw go slack. Who the hell was this guy? His River Song. Emphasis on his! Donna rolled her eyes as did a girl with red hair on the other side of them

''OI! You two! Cut it out!'' she said. They broke apart and he grinned sheepishly while Song rolled her eyes and hugged the girl

''MUM!'' she yelled. The guy groaned

''Sorry Amy, she's on a sugar high. Again. Never give River pancakes. Ever.'' he explained, rubbing the back of his head. The Doctor was still really confused. Mum?

The guy looked very worried, he called to Song

''Honey, we really need to go. The _time_.'' he said pointedly. She grinned and walked over

''Little longer Sweetie? Please?'' she gave him puppy eyes and he melted

''Five minutes. Go on then'' he grumbled and checked his watch. He rolled his eyes and tapped his foot. The Doctor was really angry. Who was this guy to have the right to call River 'Honey'. Grrrrrr. He watched grimly as he put his arm around her waist and chatted to the girl. This was too much. The Doctor tapped him on the shoulder and punched him

''Whoop! Go Spaceman!'' yelled Donna. River shot him a perfect 'Glare of sudden and painful death.' and knelt down to the guy.

''Sweetie are you OK?'' she asked. The Doctor growled, Donna giggled. She pushed his hair back from his face. The girl with red hair stalked up to him

''You regret that mate?'' she asked in a very low, Scottish voice. He shook his head. She smirked

''I was hoping you'd do that...'' she punched him full on in the face. Then kicked him, The Doctor crumpled

''That was for the raggedy man! And this' she punched him again 'is because I felt like it'. He yelped.

''How'd you get a right hook like _that_?'' he asked. She smirked

''I'm Scottish.''

**Tell me if you like it, hate it. Would rather live on Metabelis 3.4 than read it. REVIEW PLEASE!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Um... I SURRENDER! *dives behind desk to hide. Waves a white flag* Okay...before you kill me...please read! *hides***

Okay. So Amy, River and The Doctor were having a nice time chilling out on a beach somewhere on Kipperland 5 when suddenly this dude with spikey hair, converse trainers and some weird brown coat came dashing out of nowhere and punched the Doctor on the nose. Okay, maybe he should have thought that through when he saw the two angry, distinctly Scottish females on him

"Oh crap!" he yelped as he began to run away. River gave up after a while but Amy, oh she was in full on 'You-just-punched-my-best-friend-and-daughters-husband-and-I-am-VERY-pissed-off-baout-this-oh-and-by-the-way-I'm-Scottish' mode. Fair to say, the bruises that he got the last time he met Amy were like a hug form Santa to what he felt when he returned to his TARDIS, Donna laughing loudly while he grumbled

"Stupid...homicide...git...Scottish...ow...ginger"


End file.
